I was talking to my sister yesterday when she asked me, "Have you ever noticed that you can start a conversation with someone new you've met, spend half an hour listening to their life story and then they leave and they never asked you anything, not so much as your name?"
I had to admit this happens to me often. I'm at a transition in my life and looking for new friends. I'm a good listener. I put myself out there: I've joined new groups, gone to new places, started conversations. Yet, as often as the people I talk to complain about being alone, lonliness, wanting new friends, I have yet to have one of them ask me more than to repeat my name when I introduce myself.
Perhaps this is specific to our generation. My 18 year old daughter has no trouble making friends. It could be her environment; she's a senior in high school and nothing makes friends like a common enemy (teachers/school). Perhaps it is because my sister is retired now and I'm a "stay at home" mom; though we both have tried to reach out to new groups. Perhaps it is that established groups are inherently closed, abstaining from new members rather than risking rejection.
Although I believe many of these are true in many situations, I know it's not true in all and that leaves me with questions.
For those groups I've tried to join who've specifically asked for new members (eg. Meetup.com) I still run into the listen-to-me-then-leave-me-alone bunch. Why is that?
Why is it that at a time when lonliness is publicized as a major problem for many people, they turn away from friendship when it is offered? Do they not recognize it? Are they that afraid? Am I so hard to like?
I have no answers here. I am looking for answers as much as I am looking for friends. If you have anything to share, I look forward to hearing from you. Please overcome any fears and know that I will not be judgemental or evasive. This blog is nothing without commentors. I'll be checking back. 
Lori B.